He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
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