I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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