There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Randomize
