Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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