talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
