i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
