i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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