I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize