I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Randomize