Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
