he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize