Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering http://tfl.nu/580n
  Replies (4) Good night (1218) Bad night (581)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore http://tfl.nu/upfn
  Replies (9) Good night (1023) Bad night (2039)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny http://tfl.nu/9x6z
  Replies (9) Good night (626) Bad night (3012)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners... http://tfl.nu/4h9y
  Replies (40) Good night (3699) Bad night (1143)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get http://tfl.nu/sb3f
  Replies (18) Good night (1250) Bad night (3991)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information. http://tfl.nu/61w8
  Replies (6) Good night (4624) Bad night (828)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes http://tfl.nu/pban
  Replies (21) Good night (4916) Bad night (1520)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this. http://tfl.nu/3l9v
  Replies (30) Good night (1068) Bad night (7613)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression. http://tfl.nu/ii3j
  Replies (7) Good night (1416) Bad night (600)
• Favorite

  (283): View more from Ohio

  by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (283): by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours? http://tfl.nu/2a7f
  Replies (6) Good night (1938) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (912): It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school http://tfl.nu/xr6r
  Replies (9) Good night (870) Bad night (1863)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.

  (312): View more from Illinois

  So... He's a barber?

  (847): View more from Illinois

  No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part. (312): So... He's a barber? (847): No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it? http://tfl.nu/hrcs
  Replies (1) Good night (1426) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco. http://tfl.nu/xwo8
  Replies (4) Good night (609) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (+48): View more from Poland

  It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+48): It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this. http://tfl.nu/tdnl
  Replies (6) Good night (439) Bad night (329)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero http://tfl.nu/2pom
  Replies (0) Good night (502) Bad night (185)

Randomize