he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
