whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
