no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize