It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
