You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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