You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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