Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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