You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
