Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just google imaged poop.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Randomize