i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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