My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
