Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
