the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
