"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
