yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
