Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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