Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
try to milk me bitch
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