There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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