I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
