Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Randomize