My room smells like vodka and shame
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
