once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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