I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
