so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
