my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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