So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
