booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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