wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
