i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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