He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
