the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
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