Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize