Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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