So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We left the knife in your bed.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
