Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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