Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I haven't been this sober since birth.
is wine microwaveable?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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