We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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