I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
